1. Much of what initially attracts you to someone else is emotional need.
2. Almost all of these needs stem from unmet needs in your childhood. The primary needs are the need to belong and the need to be important.
3. Your childhood needs begin the process of creating a fantasy person you believe would fufill all your needs, especially the need to be special. As you grow up, the fantasy person becomes more sophisticated and the expectation become higher.
4, When searching for a potential mate, you have a checklist comprised of the qualities of your fantasy person. You subconsciously compare the prospect to your fantasy and target the closet fascimile.
5. You then try to mound that person into your ideal, through the process of spoken or unspoken expectations and demands. You believe once the person becomes exactly like your fantasy model., you will finally be loved in the way you have always wanted. You steadily pressure your love interest with your expectations and demands, reasoning that if the person"really loved me". s/he would comply.
6. Eventually, you find that your list of expectation are not being filled satisfactory, thus leading to disappointment and ultimately resentment.At the point of resentment you begin to leave the Glamour stage and enter the Disillusionment stage of relationship.
7. The key to a successful journey through Glamour is letting go and acceptance.By letting go of your expectations of your partner, you can begin to look inside for what it is you really need, Through the process of letting go of your needs you can begin to receive the light of pure love. Then you would have so much more to share with your beloved. Also practicing acceptance (not the abuse of tolerance) of your partner, you can learn to accept yourself as you are rather than thinking you need something to make you whole. Letting go and acceptance will eventually teach you that you already are whole and have everything you need within
